Perspective

I am sitting here going through photos.  

One by one the moment is touched.

The joy of my children keeps me on track.  

Their growth, my growth, their smile, my smile.  

So much life lived, so much love.

IMG_2983

Grief strikes, unexpected, unanticipated.

I embraced the photo sorting for my kids.

To give them a visual of their young life and connect them to their dad Before he died.

The marker is deep, no longer a trench of oozing goo, time has helped.

Yet, today I sit back, look and listen to where my heart is now.

I stay here, present and accounted for on November 26, 2017, 12:15PM.

I am amazed at the burning in my heart, first the anger then a deep sadness takes my breath away, I can’t stand it, the tears pour down my cheeks, warm fresh grief.  

I allow the grief to move up and out with a deep sense of appreciation for everything.

I made it through the thicket, the sludge of necessary change.

My kids made it too.  

They tell a story about love, acceptance, joy and change.

It was not easy.

The photos’ make it seem so.

To be the woman I am today and continue to become, 

I open to all that flows to and through me.

To give to my children, my new family, I must embrace me and change.  

To stand grounded, confident and at peace knowing I am enough,

I did enough and that’s all there is.

Within the grief of death there is more, the grief of my childhood, I stopped the generational system of abuse.

I confronted it, face forward, protecting myself and my children.

I am always amazed when I look at photos, the change in me, the beauty and light shining through as time passes.  

The peace within me shining through my eyes is a wonderful validation of grace.

I have faced my life experience, done the very best I know how to take responsibility for the behaviors created to survive that did not support thriving.

I have faced change and let go of, behaviors, people, places and things.

In that process I am who I am now.  

I cannot forget to honor the journey.

Do those moments of not knowing how to feel or react or express occur now, yes, they do.

Today the emotions are fresh and flowing.

I am so grateful, to be here, this moment, this breath, for me, my health, all my children, and my husband for he stands next to me and honors all that I am.

Embracing thriving, now I see, what I needed to see.  

There was joy through the sorrow.  

There was love honoring the anger and sadness.

And there was grace, gratitude, and forgiveness.

Perspective.

Thank you for reading my hearts expression.

Peace to you in all that you do.

Namaste’

Being all that we can be…for now this moment in time

IMAG0094I am so humbled and honored to be sitting in a place I love to sit, my local coffee shop sending a message out to the world. 

I hope it offers  you wisdom, hope and teaches you the power of forgiveness and grace.

As I write I want so many to hear, to see, to know, to have, to feel Joy.

To learn that it is easier to let go and forgive than ever before.

Why, because our beautiful Mother Earth is healing. 

And as she does we do and I do. 

I would call myself a Hippie, a lover of earth, a flower child. 

Yet, How could a Hippie, Healing Momma, feel somewhere deep within abandoned by Her, by Mother Earth.

As a mother of two amazing children I simply knew what I must do as a mother, protect, shelter them from harm, teach them, show them, and support them to be all that they can be.

This is Not what happened in my life.

My journey and as a mother has been so difficult for me to come to terms with the trauma I endured as a child, my mother did not protect me.

I have felt I would never be able to feel Whole and be released from the ghosts of the past and connected to Mother Earth.

I have asked for guidance, waking in the night so frightened that I am not the woman who I thought I was and why did I feel so lost and so alone.

And Then…by the grace of God, Divine Mother, I received wisdom that I must heal my relationship with my mother, mother earth and me.

I honestly thought I had done that all along yet truly I was not approaching it as she guided me to do.

Heal me first, my roots, my body, my soul and connect to Mother Earth.

Heal my relationship with her and the Divine Mother.

The blessing is…its three spirits, me, the mother within me, Mother Earth and Divine Mother.  The beauty of three. The grace of three.

The tears of relief and joy flow easily down my checks.

Thank you for reading this post, listening to my heart.  May the wisdom from my Heart and journey guide you and give you Hope.

Namaste

Change…in the Mirror of the Moon

The cow jumped over the Moon.

How much change would I have to do to jump over the Moon?

What is the Moon?

Is it Cheese?

Is it dust?

Is it Light?

moonWhy do I love it so?

My Heart moves with it.

My body loves it.

I see my Heart in It

Then why am I sometimes so afraid of the reflection?

What does it really mean, a Super Moon?

Sometimes I do not feel Super!

Love, how much we receive is how much we express.

Now I know why I Love the Moon.

I love….Love.

All in All…All in All!

I am Believer!! I Believe!

The Energy, the Love that surrounds and moves.

I Believe in Jesus, Buddha, Dali Lama, God, Divine Love and All that has been created this moment this Breath.

I love this Incredible Universe and all it has brought to my attention upon this earthly journey.

An evolutionary shift.  

A God thing, a Love thing, an Incredibly Beautiful Thing!

It’s all about the Energy.  Everything is Energy, Vibration, Love and Joy!!

Love is a Frequency and a Vibration.

Are you feeling the LOVE????!!!

All in All…All in All.

No Matter what spiritual belief you have it all comes down to Love.

It’s Big!! It’s Glorious and for certain, Filled with Beauty!

Here is what has moved through my Heart!!

I am all about noticing, seeing and enjoying the Beauty in Life. 

In difficulty or challenge,

Love is Always there.

On my journey, I have faced, honored, acknowledged, blessed, let go and surrendered to the Abundance that has been in my life and learned to

Honor, Respect, Receive and Give. 

To move in Service, with Love.

The Hardest for me to Accept and Receive was the Death of my Husband. 

I resisted, fought tooth and nail, denied and who knows what else.

Some call it, Survivors Guilt.

I did not want to embrace his Death.

I discovered it was okay, it was necessary, and truly honoring of him to embrace his Death as a blessing and his Gift.

Embracing Death is the greatest gift We can give.

No matter what form death comes in, a loved one, a job or career, a relationship, an empty nest, illness..or facing our own.

Death brings Abundance and Love 

Abundance is Love and it comes in many forms.

Consider for a moment, that Just Maybe Everything is Love, Joy and Abundance and ever – moving with Grace.

Love!  All Is LOVE!

Walk through the Veil

Today, October 31, 2012

Its the warmest Halloween, I can remember.

Change, Time and Soul’s journey brings a sense of urgency to get “things” done.

Organize

Walk

Time…

Celebrate the Journey

Laugh, Play and Rest

Work, Creating and Exploring

I have worked in the field of accounting and counting over 30 years

A field I searched the world over to find “My passionate expression”

Now, I wonder”why”

So… I write, a desire I crave more than ever before,  an outlet to express

Grace, Joy, Play and Love

Delight is bursting within me

No longer am I able to push it down, away or deny

It is time to listen….

To walk through the veil and walk in Spirit, Joy…in Grace

Honor the Journey of my Soul

Honor the Spiritual Gifts I bring and must share

I listen and hear the Joyful sounds of Play

A whisper so sweet,

“It is Time. Time to Listen to the Beat of Your Heart for there within is the Gift of Your Soul”

What Day is it?

                              Time for Lunch?                                                                       

  Time for Dinner?

Time for Love?

Time to Rest?

Time to Play?

What is time? 

We could talk about the science of it or the belief. 

I want to talk about our relationship with it.

Lately,  I am wondering.

Do I like having a schedule or being free

to design my day. 

Do I need to discipline myself?

Or am I already?

Wait, I already have a schedule and I am disciplined.

So, Then, Why, Do I and so many others feel happy yet under pressure.

Lost, yet somehow driven, completely over loaded yet pleased and grateful?

And then still so dissatisfied with ourselves or others. 

Is it emotion? Is it beliefs? Is it Time?

What is Time?

How is It impacting our lives?  

Now, this moment this breath?

The photo in this post I took the day a Deer dropped into my life! 

I was not sure what time it was then!!

Time to Change!

My thinking, my beliefs, my Life. 

What I did know…is, if I did not change and look within, something Larger

would Drop into my life.

What event in your life is calling you to change?

Are you listening?

Time to Go!!